This week, I saw first-hand the effects of China's one-child policy. It wasn't pretty.
Last Friday, one of my Chinese friends told me she's pregnant. I was happy for her, but she was obviously troubled. This was not planned, because it would mean her second child. She was nervous because her husband, who is out of town more often than not, told her that he didn't support her in the pregnancy and wanted her to get an abortion. She cried as she told me how she knows this is a life, and that it is a gift, but that she doesn't know what to do.
On Saturday, she sent me an email telling me that she checked with the local government. To have this child would require a 100,000 rmb fine ($16,000), and the child would not be guaranteed an identity. This means the child may not qualify for education, social insurance, etc. which means no security in the future. Because of this information, and the instability of her husband's job, she told me she was planning to get an abortion.
My friend aborted her baby on Monday morning. I felt sick all day long.
Before, abortion was a very cut-and-dry issue for me. After seeing my friend go through this trauma, I realize it's not so easy. Let me say this--I believe to my core that abortion is wrong. But I realize now my lack of compassion and sensitivity to the people who are put into the situation where they must choose. To me, as a young single woman, it is a simple choice. But to my Chinese friend, it was not simple. She understood the moral/ethical situation, but she also had to consider factors of marriage, family, finances, and future repercussions. Though there was a right or wrong choice, neither one was easy.
As I thought about my friend and how I might respond to her when I see her again, the Holy Spirit brought to mind the New Testament story of Jesus and the Samaritan woman at the well. In that story, Jesus approached the woman and asked her for water. He proceeded to tell her about the Living Water. When He inquired about her husband, she told him she didn't have one. "I know. You have FIVE husbands." She was shocked! Not only did this Man know her past, but He loved her anyway. She did not confess, nor did she deny. He simply spoke Truth, and invited her into His love.
I see my friend as this woman. My friend knows her sin, my friend knows that Jesus knows her sin, and what I pray desperately is that my friend knows Jesus loves her anyway.
If you think of it in the coming weeks, please pray for my friend. Pray that God would use this horrible situation to draw her to Himself. She knows about Truth, but she has not yet accepted it for herself. Pray that God would use me to speak love and forgiveness to her heart.
Jesus, you are the Master at bringing life out of death. Only you can accomplish something beautiful out of something so sinfully dark.
Catie,
ReplyDeleteAfter 12 years in China, we too had to wrestle with how to comprehend and process the use of abortion both as a method of population control and as a method of birth control. While the need for population control is completely understandable (without the one child policy, it is estimated that China would have added a population the size of the U.S. to its already strained system), I never understood why sex education and reliable birth control methods were taboo topics. Granted, there are failures in using the pill, for example. But how many abortions would be avoided if women were taught about their bodies and how to enjoy sex with their spouses without the risk of pregnancy?
Your friend's experience is, I believe, representative of the decisions forced on young couples in China and I would never presume to understand the depth of their pain. Your compassionate response and thoughtful prayers are likely to have a huge impact on how they process their decision, proving once again that while God can't control everything, He can always bring something good out of something bad.
Blessings!
Robert Hulse (formerly with Concordia)